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The 1st day of the New Year

So today is the first day of the year. woke up a little late, around 9:30 or so. It was nice to sleep in a little. Woke up to clouds but now the sun is shining bright and nicely. Should be a pretty nice day.
I am busting my butt trying to get some more income coming into the house and I honestly just DONT understand why hes a freaking man and yet he comes up with one excuse after the other about how he can't get out and help look for a job. Ok so I haven't gotten out in the world and looked for a job, BUT I make money on the net, blogging and doing the surveys and offers and so forth and it was doing alright. But now b/c of life and things we are $300 behind on things and HAVE to come up with that much at the latest by the 15th...so thats STRESS on me and so I have told Leon to get off of his duff and the least he can do is help out and try to go look for a job but him and his damn excuses. And the thing is that we didn't do the getting behind by spending on things that we didn't need or by buying Christmas etc. We did it b/c I didn't get paid all of what I was supposed to...What a way to start out the new year!!
Anyway so I am stressing to say the least and don't understand why he can't even try to lift a finger to help out! That is my lazy ass excuse for a husband!!! GRR STUPID MEN! So there goes my mind roaming yet again, wandering WHY do I put up with his crap and WHY is he still here when he doesn't do that much but yet STRESS me out way more then I need to be!!!! Here lately I haven't been able to think straight,I get sidetracked more often then I used to, I go in the other room to get something and forget what I was going in there for, I am even sitting here at the desk, click on a new tab to go somewhere and check on something and then it becomes a blank...what was I going to do? Where was I going to check on?? And sometimes it comes back to me after a few minutes and other times it doesn't come back to me. What in the world is going on with me?? So with all that going on in my life and then me worrying about money and looking for another job, I am to the point of where I am fixing to say screw it all and get the other pc so that I can do the job for $9.50 or $8.50 an hour and just try to scrape back til then. I need to figure out something, its not only frustrating but irritating. My pc isn't good enough to do the job but I know that if I rented one that it would more then be up to speed to get the job done. The training for the jobs start in mid-late January. I don't know what to do, my mind is going in a million different directions. Hence me writing a ton of crap write now and going from one thing to another.
Anyway, I guess I need to stop now, will write more later on when my brain has stopped running a million miles an hour.
Happy NEW YEAR everyone!! Hope you all have a great day and week. Hugs

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