Aug 4, 2015

Letting Go

So today's post is about Letting Go. Sometimes its just not that easy. Some things are "easier said than done" and yes this happens to be one of those things. When you hear the phrase "Letting Go" what comes to your mind? For me the first thing is to let go of someone that has done you wrong but, you just can't see it at the time that they are doing you wrong.

For me, this is letting go of not only the past with events that have happened but, letting go of one of my children. His betrayal, backstabbing, dis-respectfulness towards me and more. My middle son to be exact. He has done what us as parents and especially I believe the moms out there never want to think about the chance that our kids will betray us! Well there are a few bad apples out there and my middle son is one of them, unfortunately!!

He's done nothing but disrespect me since he came to stay with his brothers and myself about 3 years ago. Ever since then he's had a few issues with his anger (making demon noises at games that he plays when he gets really mad, frustrated and upset at them. Yes Demon noises is what my youngest son referred to the noises as and I believe it! It sounds horrible!! And then his issue of breaking/damaging other's property. For example, my car!!!! He scratched up my bumper on my car which had NO scratches/dents etc on it since I had bought it and then all of a sudden my son who was 17 at the time decides to mess up MY car!!!! My step dad looked at it and thinks that it might of been a knife that he used on it to make the scratches as deep as they are!! One of my best friends looked at it and said yea the scratches are too deep to just sand and repaint. And my car is Silver so you can definitely tell that scratches are there on the back of my car! 

What I don't get/understand is that why mess up someone else's property? If you are mad etc, I don't condone breaking anything but, if it comes to that, mess up/break something of your own! Not someone else's property!!!! And not only my car, but he broke his brother and my playstation 3 that we had as well. So yea its just little things like that, that started going downhill fast!

He began to soon after all that within a few months, he started kissing my friends behind that we were staying with. I was paying her rent for all 4 of us to stay there and he thought for hwatever reason oh he doesn't have to listen to me b/c its her house and he knew that I wouldn't holler or get onto him for not listening/doing chores etc b/c it wasn't my house! So he started kissing up to her and that is why he didn't move out with me and the other 2 boys. He decided and thought that it was more important to kiss up and lick someone else's butt rather than to respect his own mother!!

So the backstabbing and betrayal soon followed thereafter and she didn't help to make things better, just worse. So this is what leads to this post "letting go" I'm letting go of not only a beset friend of over 25 years and a woman that I have called my sis all through out the years but I'm also Letting Go of a son!!! My own son! I've decided that when he feels that he can come to me and be a grown up and stop kissing up to someone that he barely knows and only kisses up to her to get something out of it, if he should possibly ever decide to behave and respect the one that raised him and gave birth to him then I'll consider having him back in my life but, until then, I'm letting go of both of them. Because of betrayal and backstabbing which does nothing but equals drama and I don't do or go for drama!! Never have and never will!!

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